Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Randomize
