Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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