4 words: hood of his car
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Randomize
