why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
