why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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