I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize
