I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
