I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
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