There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Holy shit dude........stairs
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
