it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
She's just so happy...and so naked.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
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