i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
