Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
