dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize