I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
