the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Randomize
