protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize