I'm laying in your front yard are you home
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
