Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
