stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
