it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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