One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
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