He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
