I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
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