What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
