Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
