Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Randomize
