cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
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