He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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