in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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