just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
porn star boner night. come get it.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Randomize