bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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