hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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