just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
