i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
