Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
