I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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