O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
as a side note pls kill me
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize