she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
