rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
