Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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