I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
You did what with his pubic hair?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
