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I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
everyone is single if you try hard enough
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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