Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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