Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
