is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
