chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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