ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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