What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
