Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
You drew a lightning bolt on your eye and stomach in eye liner and made me sing Poker face with you in harmonies. I never knew you were still a music major when you were drunk.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Randomize
