Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Randomize
