Please, let me fuck your mom
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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