bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
