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I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize