I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
